Mine just happens to be my little sisters. I don’t want to put them through the pain of losing me, and I don’t want them to have to grow up feeling unloved. I’m sick of people telling me that it is wrong that I keep going for my little sisters and not for myself. I don’t think it matters what keeps you going, I think what matters is that you keep going despite all the bullshit and heartbreaks. I would rather deal with that every day than have to give up hugging my sisters and telling them that they are my princesses and I love them. Anyone that says you have to love yourself before you can love anyone else doesn’t know what the fuck they are talking about. The fact that I’m still here, the fact that I am willing to move back from Texas and end things with the best guy I have ever met just to see them, the fact that whenever I have the gas I make a drive that is three hours each way just to see them, the fact that if they needed anything I would drop everything just to be there for them, that speaks levels. My main motivation for getting better, going to college, and staying alive has never been myself, it has always been my little sisters, and I’m honestly more than okay with that. That is why I always go to my dad’s when I feel horrible, because I know the second Kami runs up and jumps in my lap, the second Brynnie reaches up for me, and the second Korie and I start telling each other everything any bit of misery I have seems insignificant.



